Film Reviews by Timmy B

With this film, following on from Lock Stock, Guy Ritchie cemented his reputation as the master of the Cockney comedy.

Often copied but never bettered, this multiple-plotline film takes in diamond dealers, unlicensed boxing promotors and gangsters. All the stories perfectly fit together and the humour is never bettered.

The cast are uniformly great, whether it's Brad Pitt or ADE as Tyrone. The slightly dated look due to the budget also really helps the film.

Watch this, laugh your head off, then rent RocknRolla, which was in many ways the continuation of this incredible universe. Just avoid Revolver...

This film is for many people Mike Leigh's masterpiece, a jet black plunge into misery, hopelessness and hell. But for me, it was akin to walking through treacle whilst being spat on.

The strange thing is that I am often a big fan of films/characters which are anti-heroes to the extreme, the best example being Ewan McGregor's character Joe in Young Adam. Anti-heroes can go, in my view, to far more honest and impactful places than a standard protagonist. But even they have to have some redeemable features.

But Johnny, the lead in Naked, is just vile. As in really, really horrible. You wonder why anyone would want to hang around with him and how he even is able to be tolerated by the people he meets. Talking in machine gun fashion, spewing out bile and judgement, he may to some be this incredible sage who is stepping outside society to critique it. But his own life and view of things makes him the most pitiful & squalid of anyone. And whilst he may in some ways acknowledge this, to then spend a whole film with him casting judgement on others is just repugnant in the extreme. The honest truth however, as shown by the film's events, is that what he is above everything else is a thief, either of property or other people's emotions and empathy.

The other thing which has to be said about Johnny's rants are that, as much as there is the odd clever thing he may spit out, most of it is just tedious, stupid and unfunny. The main response I found myself thinking was "If this society is so heinous, move to a monastery, give up all your possessions and become a monk. Then you'll be surrounded by people who only worship God, and as you practically consider yourself one, you'll have the perfect person to evangelize."

The other part of this film that I had a huge problem with was the misogyny. The film opens with Johnny violently raping a woman and then fleeing. But the film then shows him with women either throwing themselves at him or certainly putting up with him belittling them non-stop. The film's message seems to be that the women of this "world" are perfectly happy to tolerate and even find this way of treating them something to accept. At least Joe knew what he was and would remove himself from the situation, telling one woman "I am not someone you want to marry."

I gave up watching the film after about an hour. As much as part of me felt I should watch it to the end, the honest truth is I didn't want to. Leigh's London is not a place I wanted to stay, especially not to spend the entire time with someone who deserves almost nothing but contempt.

I so wanted this to be amazing. The trailer looked great, the cast incredible (especially Rami Malek coming off the back of his Oscar win,) and the actual story had the potential for something incredible. It was teased as a slow-building, old-style whodunnit cop story, particularly in the style of Insomnia, one of my favourite cop thrillers of all time. Amusingly, Insomnia also starred 3 Oscar winners and focused on an oddball loner weirdo. But sadly that's where the similarities end.

The film as a whole is dreadful. It is an unbelievably dated, boring and glacial trudge through a standard rote story. The biggest problem was the script, which is where the dated criticism is most poignant. The film itself was first written in 1993 and you get the sense that had it been made & edited then, it would have turned out very different and probably would have been inestimably better. But it got stuck in development hell and sadly this is the result.

And I genuinely wanted to love it. It does have a lot going for it. The cast are some of the best actors working today, but they are squandered. For example, one of the biggest missed opportunities was with Malek and Leto. The two of them have and can tap into such a creepy, idiosyncratic and unsettling energy that I thought a proper face-off between them, either in an interrogation room or out on the street would not only be phenomenal but also a given. But this never properly happens. All we get is Malek as the dependable cop who follows Leto and then when the two do meet face to face, it ends not with a bang but a damp squib.

And speaking of Leto, there is something frustrating in the way that he is portrayed, both in terms of his attitude & also his look. I know that there is a temptation in these types of films to make the suspect look guilty, but this is just taken to ludacris levels in The Little Things. Albert Sparma is every single caricature & stereotype it's possible to be. He looks like what a tabloid-reading, curtain-twitching paranoid middle-class housewife would imagine a man suspected of those type of crimes would look like. The only thing Leto doesn't do is cackle, look at the screen and scream in a high pitched voice "I'm doing these evil things!!! Hahaha!" And this is another thing which totally derails the movie: it is too ridiculous to work in a real-world drama and would even struggle in a fantasy/comic book world.

Washington brings the usual gravitas he can muster with ease, but again the film wastes him, which is even more criminal considering the first few scenes with him set up what could be a fascinating story.

The film is fairly competently directed by John Lee Hancock and does have some achingly beautiful night shots as well. But this cannot and does not rescue the film from its schlocky & slow path towards an ending with no real payoff and a movie that never manages to capitalise on the potential it had in spades.

Despite having the pedigree of Chan-wook Park directing, plus also the erotic thriller elements which I often love in films/adds real spice to the narrative, this just never caught fire for me.

I was at times confused, but then in the end just didn't care. There were double-crosses and the cast really were committed to their parts, but it didn't translate for me.

But, one saving grace of this film was how it looked: the cinematography, colour palette and mise-en-scene were perfection. So, even though I didn't care what was going on on the screen, at least it all looked good whilst it was happening.

A long, grimly lit and unfortunately quite boring film which never really goes anywhere.

Ewan McGregor plays a private investigator who is following Judd's character, a serial killer, and then falls in love with her, to the extent he starts covering up for her crimes.

As much as it is an interesting premise and Judd in particular is at times very enigmatic, I just lost interest in it. I did manage to get to the end, but the plot becomes ridiculous and the ending quite silly.

A shame that it wasn't more, as there was potential for it to really go to some unexpected places.

When Crank first exploded onto our screens, it established a type of film where a famous A lister (in that case Jason Statham,) would literally be put in situations where the most outrageous things you could imagine happened. Whether it was doing coke off a filthy club toilet floor or running around in a hospital gown with a medically-induced erection, pretty much nothing was off-limits. And because of that crazy energy, Crank was an absolute blast.

It is very clear that Jason Lei Howden has not only seen both Cranks multiple times, but also loves that world and wants to put his own spin on it. The biggest asset he has, amusingly enough, is Radcliffe. As has been noted by pretty much everyone, since finishing Harry Potter, Radcliffe has done everything possible to distance himself/go in the opposite direction to his most famous role. It is a masterclass in not being typecast. Whether it's playing an undercover agent/Neo-Nazi, or a farting corpse guide, his work has been completely unique and massive praise should be given to him.

But as much as Radcliffe is game for the different situations he finds himself in, the film as a whole is too clunky to really smash it out of the park. Whereas Crank had a lightness of touch which meant everything worked and zipped along at a nice pace, this gets bogged down in story and exposition, none of which I really cared about. There is a very funny and interesting angle in terms of the film posing the question "What would happen if all the disgusting trolls on the internet finally got their comeuppance?" But this can't sustain an entire film.

But it does in a weird way work. Radcliffe is good in the action scenes and as much as it could be schlocky, there was just enough good stuff to offset the bad. It's not a film I'd watch again but it definitely is an interesting world to dip into, especially to see the ridiculous situations the child star of Harry Potter willingly put himself into.

On paper, this looked like a riot. A superhero film of baddies, blackmailed and forced to take on a supernatural villain, with a director in David Ayer who has made some great films before. Plus, there was no 12A/PG-13 requirement from the studio to censor the film, such as in the case of The Expendables 3, to ruin things. And finally, there was the most incredible cast, including Will Smith, Jared Leto, Viola Davis & Margot Robbie. What could go wrong?

It turns out, a lot.

Unfortunately, it would have taken a miracle for this film to not have been a total and utter mess. The behind-the-scenes/production troubles have since become legendary, the main one being that the entire tone of the script/film had to be changed 6 weeks before shooting started. There was also a change in lead actor from Tom Hardy to Joel Kinnaman due to the delays. And finally, which has resulted in a petition to get the “Ayer Cut,” the studio took over the film editing and released a totally different version of the film than the director wanted.

I have to be honest though, irrelevant of what changes could be made and reshot, I think the film’s problems are far, far bigger. For a start, this isn’t a fun movie. It’s a dark, dank, turgid and glum film, which isn’t helped by the grimy look Ayer decided to give it. Unfortunately, this is another example of the world that Christopher Nolan so brilliantly created in The Dark Knight trilogy being copied over, without the other parts which made those films masterpieces. As much as yes, it wouldn’t work if the sun was always out, to be so dark and dank is also not something that lends itself to the lightness that the film is in many ways wanting to achieve.

The other thing which became so grating after a while was the constant talk from all the characters about how “They are the bad guys.” When the film has to keep reminding you that this is the case, but also is trying to be edgy and fun, it’s not doing its job correctly. It’s like the cast desperately saying to you with perma-grins “We really enjoyed making this. You should be enjoying watching it!”

The narrative choices also affect the cast and performances, especially Jared Leto’s Joker. In the end, for a film which so heavily featured the Joker in its trailers and marketing campaign, his screentime is probably around the 20-minute mark. Leto himself has commented about how upset he was to learn that so many of the scenes he shot got cut. When Leto is on screen, he really is good, but even he cannot surmount the script and narrative issues. Everyone else does their best and there are some great action scenes, especially from Smith. But saying these action stars are good at action scenes is a bit like saying Seabuscuit is a fast horse... We know they can be great, now please give them a good film to act in!

When you try to describe the plot of this film, there will always be bewildered faces staring back at you: “Errr so it’s about a successful CEO called Walter Black, who finds a beaver puppet, then has a mental breakdown, thinks the puppet is talking to him and then takes over his life. He is then alienated from his entire family and destroys his business, but finds the meaning he craves along the way...?” “Yes, basically.”

But this film is so weird and yet so straight-faced, that actually a lot of it works in a strange way. Gibson commits completely and utterly to this role, never once having an ounce of self-consciousness. The movie as a whole is also very well-directed by Jodie Foster, who also stars as Gibson’s wife.

But unfortunately, around the middle section of the film, things then just don’t work and start to fall apart. The premise, which just about held together up to that point, collapses. For example, there is simply no way that Walter would not have been sectioned. It’s all very well showing the toll Walter’s antics with the puppet take on his family, but any self-respecting and loving wife would have called the psychiatric emergency number to get her husband medical care. Then the final section, including a shocking act of violence, just pushes everything over the edge. When the film attempts redemption, it is done so nakedly and cynically that you just tune out.

But despite this, it’s still worth a watch. It is at times genuinely funny and maximum praise must go to Foster and Gibson for actually trying something new and really pushing the boat out. Sadly, on this occasion it was more miss than hit.

In the past couple of years, Nicholas Cage has had a career renaissance. Gone (for the most part,) are the multiple films churned out each year with little to no quality, with many of them really scraping the bottom of the barrel. We now are treated to films such as Mandy, The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent and one of my other personal favourites Joe.

But this film really is exceptional, for so many reasons. One of the biggest is that it is in many ways a complete rug pull from what you expect. One review I did read, which said it better than anyone else, was that many people would look at this and think "Taken, but with a pig instead of a daughter, but then becomes the furthest thing from that imaginable."

I am going to do my best to be as vague as possible, because this is one of those films which, the less you know, the better. But this is the most extraordinarily sensitive, delicate and emotional film you could imagine. Cage's ex-chef character, Rob Feld, lives an isolated and idyllic life, making his living foraging for expensive truffles with his prized and irreplaceable-to-him pig. Then one night he is brutally attacked and his pig stolen, emotionally destroying him. This sets off a journey to find and rescue his pig.

For many people, as referenced above, this is where they imagine that we get a full crazy Cage performance and ludicrous story. But this story does the total opposite to that and thank God. Because this film then becomes an odyssey through the underbelly of Portland, taking all sorts of turns you wouldn't imagine.

But the other thing is just how bloody emotional this film is. It is in parts so sad and makes you feel this profoundly. You understand, through the skill of Cage's performance, just how much he loved his pig and his life up to that point. Far from being a joke, this is a film of redemption and trying to carry on when you are drowning in pain.

And this film really does belong to Cage. He is incredible, moving, brilliant and perfect in the role. In this micro-budget film (so small that they couldn't afford a trained pig or do additional takes, meaning every shot was either the first or second one filmed,) he absolutely fills the screen with brilliance.

For me, the only reason it didn't get 5 stars was because sadly, there was some excess material which made the film that little bit too long, even at just under 90 minutes. There were also a couple of scenes that did go on that little too long, but this are minor minor quibbles.

This film is amazing, I loved it and I hope there are plenty more performances like this that we are to be treated to from Cage.

After Lee Tamahori had ruined James Bond with the atrocious, terrible Die Another Day, rather than be left alone for a while to think about what he'd done, he was immediately given the keys to another franchise, although this one had nowhere near the pedigree of Bond.

When this film was released, I remember the wall to wall terrible reviews. So when I was staying with a friend and we went to Blockbuster to rent something (remember those days?!) when he said this was what he wanted to rent, I was completely against it. Especially when there were many classic Arnie and Stallone films we could have got. But he was adamant that we got this so I gave in.

When we got home and put it on, I lasted about 25 minutes. If you thought Die Another Day looked tacky and gaudy, you're in for a treat. This film is headbangingly terrible, literally like sticking your head inside a washing machine full of cutlery. The CGI has this polished, unreal and totally alien look, which just gives you a headache. The performances make Tommy Wiseau look like a combination of De Niro, Pacino and Day-Lewis.

The only funny thing I remember of that night was that after I'd walked out, saying it was terrible, about 5 minutes later my friend came out as well and in a low voice said "Yeah that sucked..."

Back when Nicholas Cage was taking every script & offer that came his way, this was one of the films which sadly didn't really work, despite his best efforts.

The basic story of a mob boss targeted and his daughter murdered, then the desperate attempt to find and punish her killers, is a story as old as time. But this script is terrible, full of unconvincing acting and strange choices.

Mercifully however, and what gets it 2 stars, is an INCREDIBLE Cage freak-out at one of his henchmen. As you see the meltdown coming, you start to rub your hands with glee. And absolutely it is worth the wait.

When the ending comes, for many people it will have been a terrible film. But there are those little nuggets of charm that slightly elevate it above awful.

After the fairly decent Match Point, Woody Allen remains in London/an East End setting for this movie. But all of the technique and storytelling deserts him for this piece of dreck.

Ewan McGregor and Colin Farrell are cast as brothers Ian and Terry. But aside from not looking particularly related, they don't behave in any way like brothers. The awkwardness which is on screen whenever they are together is almost palpable. Amusingly, the one way in which they are related though is their terrible accents. Even though in real life they are Scottish and Irish, they don't have particularly strong accents and have in the past done good accents for films.

But these East London accents are another level. We are talking Dick Van Dyke in Mary Poppins territory. You wonder how Allen directed this with a straight face, let alone how the studio agreed to put it out. I literally couldn't take it seriously.

But even when you get past the accents, things are still dire. Amusingly, this film was released in 2007, a year before In Bruges. In both that film and this, Colin Farrell's character has a breakdown due to horrific trauma he has endured. With In Bruges, you feel this with every fibre of your being, the pain radiating out of the screen. However, in Cassandra's Dream, it looks like he's eaten some dodgy food and got some trapped wind.

The morality tale is the standard fare, but even that is dull and boring. When an actress of the skill of Hayley Atwell can't liven up proceedings, you know you are in trouble. And as the plot gets more far fetched, you find yourself sitting back and counting not only the plot holes but the sheer stupidity. The police are shown as being utterly incompetent, to the extent that they can't even do basic investigation.

And then, the film ends, not with a bang but with a whimper. And as the credits roll, you find yourself thinking "Did that just happen? Did I just watch a group of incredible actors star in something which even Tommy Wiseau would say "This is not up to snuff."

The answer is yes, sadly.

Coming strangely enough from what was originally the Beverly Hills Cop script that Stallone was writing, this is a real mess of a film, both in its politics and narrative choices.

The LA depicted in this film is so depraved and violent, it's a wonder that anyone wanted to live there. In particular, as a friend of mine put it, "There's no other reason for crime other than evil people who do bad things and need to be killed." But there is also a ludicrous energy to the film that makes it strangely watchable.

And nowhere is that more prevalent than the relentless pursuit of Ingrid Knudsen, the lead female character. In the early parts of the film, she witnesses a massacre with the leader of the group. The group are then determined to track her down and kill her, presumably to stop her identifying them. And the way that they attempt to do this is not stealthy, but to literally turn up with machine guns and slaughter EVERYONE they can see, hoping that they'll hit her in the crossfire, thus drawing massive attention to themselves.

It's all very very silly, but it also is really nasty at points, showing itself to almost be a precursor to Rambo: Last Blood. But there is absolutely fun to be had here, especially on a Friday night watching it with mates.

I adore this film. It is funny, heartbreaking, moving and silly, sometimes all at the same time.

I remember at the time the enormous critical plaudits and almost uniform 5 star reviews. I loved it at the time and still love it now.

All of the cast are flawless and I absolutely include Kevin Spacey in that. Irrelevant of the accusations against him which have been made many years after this film, he gives an incredible and great performance. And alongside him, Annette Bening and Mena Suvari are also exceptional.

The soundtrack is a work of genius, so much so that even today it is still used in TV programmes/adverts.

And finally, the cinematography by Conrad L. Hall is beautiful and he was rightly rewarded for this stunning lensing.

This film is a masterpiece. I loved it and I hope you do as well.

If you cast your mind back to pre-2008, and mentioned Liam Neeson, most people would think of a wide range of genres & performances, whether it was Oskar Schindler, Qui-Gon Jinn or Michael Collins. Then a little film called Taken, made for practically pennies, came along & made over $220 million, turning Neeson overnight into a later-life action star. Since then, pretty much all of his films, bar one or two, have been in a very similar vein: older man who is able to unleash hell goes after baddies and cleans up, usually not getting hurt and going off smiling into the sunset.

The reason I started the review like this is because, when you press play, this is what many people expect this film to be: another production line slightly schlocky action film. And it is a wonderful surprise that the biggest rug pull is that it's the furthest thing from that, despite amusingly setting up at various times the sort of scenes where you expect Neeson to suddenly flip.

Matthew Scudder is a washed-up, ex alcoholic cop who quit the force after a traumatic confrontation and becomes a private investigator. So far, so every cliché you could imagine. But the genius of the film is that Scudder doesn't use guns or brawn, he actively dislikes and avoids it, preferring to talk people down, but always with the threat that he could neutralise them if they attacked him (cleverly using the viewer's pre-knowledge of Neeson's back catalogue to make this completely believable.) There are also scenes where Scudder is attacked and doesn't fight back, showing a vulnerability which keeps you hooked. And as the film uses this type of storytelling, you care much more about what happens & really invest in the story.

The other great thing this film has in spades is the fantastic cast. Dan Stevens, after starring in The Guest, brings the same lethal charm & gravitas to his role as the destroyed husband of one of the previous victims. The pain he shows along with the hurt & vengeance fills the screen. Another fantastic set of performances come from Adam David Thompson and (before he was well-known) David Harbour as the two kidnappers. Harbour in particular is an absolute monster, totally unhinged & deriving the kind of sick gratification from his crimes that makes your skin crawl. And finally, Brian "Astro" Bradley as Scudder's sidekick TJ, a streetwise kid who despite being homeless, wants a better life for himself and manages to pull off the trick of being played exactly right: not too needy, annoying or distracting of the main narrative. The film even finds time to flesh out his own backstory.

One of the other things about this film which I loved was just how dark it was. The violence, whilst sparse, was at times really unpleasant and shocking. But it was never gratuitous, adding to the overall extreme unease and threat running through the film.

But it was also good that in the final scenes, action fans are also given their payoff. But the film has really earned this and the ending is perfectly realised and written.

Out of all of Neeson's recent work, this is by far the best thing he has done. A perfect meld of thriller, action but also welcomingly the chance for someone who has always been an outstanding actor to actually be able to show the incredible talent he has. The only sadness is that, unlike a lot of his other films, this one did not make megabucks at the box office, so sadly we won't get the chance to revisit this world again and that is a true loss.