Film Reviews by LC

Whilst essentially a loose remake of 1977's 'Rabid', this film actually has echoes of several Cronenberg films, with moments harking back to the likes of 'Shivers', 'The Brood' and even 'Dead Ringers'. Some of the lead actors, and indeed several entire scenes, feel unconvincing and a bit on the amateur dramatic side - but there is a partial out given in that we are not sure exactly which scenes are 'real' and hallucinations, plus kooky , over the top and downright weird performances and moments were part and parcel of most of Cronenberg's best films, so it's hardly bad form. The full-on tentacle waving body horror of the climax is both slightly ludicrous and entirely in keeping with the source material.

It's by no means perfect, and it goes without saying that ultimately as a remake this isn't an improvement on Cronenberg's original - but it does come across as a well-meaning and solid tribute to the director's unique brand of body horror. [3.5 out of 5]

Ultimately, this is another 'haunted house' story - something the first series already did to better effect - only this time with a sprinkling of cannibal hillbillies. Conceptually, there are some interesting aspects here, with the series riffing on reality TV, and people affected by real-life tragedies interacting with the actors who portrayed them in 'dramatic reconstructions'. Sadly things fall to pieces during the second half of the series when things go into 'found footage' territory - characters start illogically filming everything and each other on their phones - even whilst in mortal peril, and we get endless scenes of people running around the the same two locations screaming 'oh my God!', with some of the worst English accents you'll ever hear. Previous seasons of 'American Horror Story' have been wildly inconsistent in terms of quality, but they've usually had enough crazy performances and over-the-top moments to at least be fun - this series seems to try to play things straighter, but the 'reality' footage never looks anything but fake, so it just doesn't connect, and ends up a pretty dreary bore.

Fair play to this film for its artistic ambition and willingness to set out on its own path, but ultimately this remake just doesn't come close to the power of Argento's original classic. The garish 70's colours and soundtrack of the original have been deliberately inverted, so this time round everything feels bleak, muted and wintery. The first three quarters of the film, with the menace at the heart of the dance school being slowly uncovered are reasonably effective - slow, but with a certain hypnotic charm. Unfortunately the explicit horror climax (complete with rubber monster prosthetics and CGI gore) is a complete mess, and derails much of the tone of what went before. The film is stuffed with allusions to contemporary political events but doesn't seem to quite know what to do with them, whilst the constant intrusion of the story of an old man (played by Tilda Swinton under layers of prosthetics, for some unknown reason) and his long-lost wartime love keeps derailing the focus from the main heroine. Ultimately, this feels both overstuffed and unfocused - some rigorous editing and hacking down the 2.5 hour running time might have resulted in a tighter and more coherent film. Sometimes less really is more.

This was ultimately a frustrating viewing experience, as this film seemed to offer so much more. It starts with a bang (quite literally), and the first half (starring Raffey Cassidy as the young lead) points towards an interesting take on the nature of fame, celebrity and the exploitation of tragic events. Despite a portentious voice-over from Willem Dafoe hinting at earth-shattering events to come, however, the film ultimately goes nowhere. Natlie Portman takes over as the older version of the lead character, and the film keeps threatening to explore interesting avenues (copycat violence, the pop star as religion), only to ultimately ignore them. Instead we get a final ten minute scene of a mind-numbingly dull arena show performance, with Portman very unconvincing in the role of Madonna/Lady Gaga-esque pop diva, some instantly forgettable songs and generic light show and backing dancers....and that's it. The film doesn't come to any kind of dramatic climax, it just stops. There are enough arty flourishes that it makes you feel like something deeper must be being explored, but ultimately it's the same bog-standard 'showbiz can f*** people up' story that's been told a million times before. Not entirely awful - a great opening, and I pretty much enjoyed most of the first half - but ultimately this story just fizzles out.

Visually this looks OK, although every frame is dripping in so much CGI (including the main character), that at times it becomes difficult to tell why they didn't just animate the entire thing, especially when the human actors give such hammy and cartoonish performances. All the characters are ludicrous stock types spouting generic cliches, and the entire tone of the film seems to be aimed at a very young age group, but the strange inclusion of a couple of swear words needlessly pushes this into a 12 rating (which I would argue should be an upper age limit). The script is a mess, being both overstuffed (it jumps around numerous plot points without ever really developing most of them, leaving the main villain and his motivation a complete enigma) and ultimately too thin, as the lack of conclusion makes it clear this isn't so much a self-contained film, but just what the studio hopes will be the first part in an ongoing franchise. Young children will find the visual noise and large characters entertaining, but this is otherwise irredemable and empty-headed nonsense.

This is well-shot, and looks good, but the storyline sticks so close to the original film that by the end you are wondering why they didn't just do a straight remake. Another tale of childhood wonder vs. the stifling evil bank; Cockney chimneysweep replaced by a lamplighter (complete with group dance routine); a trip to cartoon-land; a visit to a relative who floats on the ceiling replaced by a scene with a relative whose house turns upside down, etc etc. None of this would matter so much if these scenes were an improvement on the originals, but they just feel like hollow repetitions. This film is so busy trying to be a homage to the first film, it forgets to bring anything new to the table, which makes the whole thing feel like a pointless exercise. Like watching colourful but ultimately boring wallpaper. 2.5 out of 5

Not expecting much, I was pretty blown away by this film. Give another treatment, this could have been a fairly standard thriller/murder mystery, but the direction and black and white cinematography is gorgeous, and the whole thing is dripping in atmosphere. The plot doesn't so much progress from standard investigative procedure, as by a series of intuitive flashbacks and hallucinatory fever-dreams, which gives everything a strange dreamlike feel. The only reason I'm not giving this the full 5 out of 5, is that when the final explanation comes it is perhaps not quite as fulfilling as the lead up has been, but this is still a hugely impressive work. If you like 'Psycho', or the better Dario Argento films, this is definately one to watch.

This film looks a million dollars (well, several million), and on high-definition format on a big TV it's just about worth watching for the visuals alone. Unfortunately, despite the interesting concept of mobile cities preying on each other, the characters and and storyline here are nothing but obvious genre cliché and the dialogue is frequently ripe with cheese. Would recommend for children, who are too young or innocent to spot the clichés piling up (and apparently this is based on a Young Adult novel, so maybe a 'kids' film' is all it was ever intended to be) - anyone else, and you're just going to have to try to switch your brain off and enjoy the pretty pictures.

Two girls travel through a post-apocalyptic city, occasionally encountering other survivors, robots or life-forms, and uncovering scraps of information about how their world became this way. In terms of pacing, this is very sedate, with little in the way of action or even incident for large sections, but it does have a certain hypnotic appeal. Ultimately, equally charming and boring, but if you are looking for something a bit different and more relaxed, this is not without appeal.

For me, Alan peaked with 'I'm Alan Partridge' - particularly the first season, where every character was amazing and pretty much every line was a quotable classic. This latest outing is pretty much in line with every Partridge-related outing since then - it's decent, and there are enough great moments to make it worthwhile (Alan practicing corporal punishment on a model schoolboy is a particular standout), but as a whole it's just too patchy and uneven to stand up to that all-time classic. Still, some decent laughs, so it's definitely good - it's just not great.

A solid film noir thriller, though the resolution feels very rushed and not particularly satisfying.

This is a difficult film to rate - I found the first half pretty enjoyable viewing, but the second half mostly lost me. Nothing much happens in the first half (other than some wild dancing), but there are lots of inventive camera moves, long takes, colour and sound, and I found it interesting in an 'arty' way. For the second half of the film, things shift more into horror mode as the spiked drink kicks in, but I couldn't really buy into the reality of the situation, and endless scenes of people wandering around screaming hysterically ultimately felt slightly boring. Despite that, there's enough visual invention here that I'd say this is still worth a watch if you appreciate more off-beat and arty films, it's just a shame the largely improvised narrative isn't stronger. (3.5 out of 5)

Whilst clearly low-budget, 'Mandy' is rich with style - dripping with psychedelic colours and a deliberately retro 80s feel that extends to the soundtrack. However, whilst Initially seeming to take inspiration from a bunch of Charles Manson-like crazies, it soon becomes clear that in terms of storyline this is a completely generic revenge thriller, with nothing original to say. Think 'Kill Bill' (and yes, this has cartoon interludes as well), only without either the budget or Tarantino's snappy dialogue. There is still enough visual colour and whacky performances for this to be an enjoyably off-beat watch, but by the end it's hard not to feel that it's all slightly empty spectacle. Still, fun in a knowingly retro 'Hobo With a Shotgun' kinda way.

I wanted to like this film more - the idea of a traumatised survivor fully prepared for Michael's inevitable return is a good one, but sadly it's not really explored in any great depth, with far too much time given over to the latest batch of disposable teens rather than Jamie Lee Curtis' character. The film also feels far too predictable and formulaic - rather than giving a breath of fresh-air to the franchise, this feels like any number of previous forgettable sequels. A shame. Works just about as a passable entertainment, but not a film I'll ever need to watch again.

This first half of this film, where we follow a family struck by tragedy, is pretty well done, with the supernatural elements being subtle enough that you are not sure whether they are real or just a manifestation of the lead character being overwhelmed by grief and mental illness. Unfortunately however the film plays it's hand way too early, and any sense of realism is lost as the second half descends into a cartoonish mass of horror film clichés. The underlying story is pretty solid, and there are some decent bits, but I can't help but feel that a little restraint would have gone a long way here.