Film Reviews by NP

I was initially attracted to this French film because of the highly-billed inclusion of Brigitte Lahaie. Sadly, however, she’s barely in it, and plays an entirely peripheral character. With that disappointment out of the way, there is a huge amount to enjoy here – however, I think ‘The Ordeal’ is something of an acquired taste.

Travelling cabaret singer Marc Stevens (Laurent Lucas) becomes stranded in the formidable, rolling forests of the Ardennes, but Mr Bartel (Jackie Berroyer), a kindly inn-keeper offers not only to put him up for the night but to fix his van the following morning. Also along the way, Stevens comes into contact with the distracted Boris (Jean-Luc Couchard ), who is dejectedly looking for his dog, lost in the snow. That Boris then turns up at the inn, and is clearly a good friend of Bartel, doesn’t bode well: one would hope Boris’s broken mind is a lone malady that separates him from the nearby villagers – in fact, the whole community is similarly unstable.

Quite why this should be is never explained: it just is. Why the village is allowed to operate in the way it does without interference from the law is equally unfathomable. But if you don’t mind the lack of explanations, this is an enjoyably hellish ride. Poor Stevens makes every attempt to reason with and placate those who wish him harm, and also carries out valiant escape attempts – but things continue not to look good for him.

This reminds me of a ‘straight’ version of quirky UK dark comedy ‘The League of Gentlemen’, and shares with it a nightmarish environment – but there are no laughs here. The endless surrounding area could not be more isolated, with the punishing weather only compounding that. Bartel’s compulsion to turn his guest into his dead wife Gloria is carried out in a surprisingly nasty way, and that fact that the villagers share his wishes give the viewer the overwhelming idea that things are going to turn very nasty for Stevens. And they do.

This French/Romanian film features Olivia Bonamy and Michaël Cohen as Clémentine and Lucas, a couple whose lives are about to get very unpleasant. Torture, ritualistic brutality and an increasing atmosphere of ‘we’re not going to get out of this’ permeates throughout this intimately told story of genuine horror. This is all the more frightening because, if the blurb is to be believed, it was based on true events.

Feral, murderous children is a theme that isn’t new. But if handled well, it can be shocking. And so it is here. That the atrocities occur so close to ‘respectable’ civilisation injects and extra dimension into it. As Clémentine impotently screams for help by a roadside full of commuters too busy to see or help, it is frustrating for the viewer that she is in such continual straits.

Set up as one big, futile rush for freedom amidst moments of graphic horror and overwhelming hopelessness (courtesy of directors/writers David Moreau and Xavier Palud) the story might prove to be too thin for some. However, the 77-minute set-piece contains enough jeopardy and nastiness to appeal to me. Recommended.

This 2009 production is set in the 1980s and as such, gives a pretty accurate depiction of those times, minus many of the peroxide and fashionable extremes. Even perennial musical entrepreneur Thomas Dolby’s magnificent ‘One of our Submarines’ can be heard at one stage.

This Ti West scripted/directed film features the appealing Jocelin Donahue as Samantha, whose search for employment leads her into some increasingly dark directions. Baby-sitting a non-existent child doesn’t fill anyone with optimism about her current job, but she perseveres.

A fairly pedestrian storyline isn’t helped by the unevenly slow pacing of events. There are some gory moments, and some effectively staged set-pieces, but these are infrequent, and far too much time is spent setting things up that never seem to come to anything. This changes in the last act, when Samantha’s plight becomes more than slow-burning teasers, and something manifestly evil. Herein, the more traditional moments of horror are welcome after a long time waiting.

This is an above average teen-based horror that taps into an interesting premise. Social media. Unwanted attention. Who exactly are you accepting as a ‘friend’ on what is to all intents and purposes Facebook? And especially pertinent – how social media has become a vital part of our lives; a few years ago, a subject like this wouldn’t have existed.

Laura (Alycia Debnam-Carey) is being cyber-stalked after accepting a friend request from the classroom outcast, who sees her as a ‘sister.’ Marina (Liesl Ahlers) is something of a textbook ‘weirdo’ – on one hand she is just another pretty girl who chooses to dress down and indulge herself in goth imagery. On the other, she is genuinely fragile, stigmatised by a hair-pulling disorder. Things become typically intense, with Marina taking her subsequent rejection extremely badly and displaying she possesses certain demonic qualities.

What I thought was going to be blighted by depictions of the youngsters as massively irritating (teensploitation?), actually takes various satisfyingly dark turns and provides some successful mood-pieces and jump-scares. However, it is content to follow the paths of other horrors before it (particularly ‘The Ring’, I thought), and although the characters are fairly likeable, there’s little to distinguish them. That said, what this does, it does well.

“Bite me,” instructs Nora (Nicki Aycox), and floundering decent guy Jarrett (Marc Blucas) isn’t sure he wants to. But Nora’s highly charged, insatiable sexuality doesn’t seem to accept uncertainties. These two performers are excellent in what is little more than a series of passionate sexual encounters and gore. Her ‘other beau’ Vic (Naveen Andrews) also shares her feral instincts and is clearly not someone with whom you would wish to ‘mess.’

Stylistically, this reminded me of a kind of cross between the slinky sexiness of ‘Underworld (2003)’ and the trailer-park atmospherics of ‘Near Dark (1987)’. Not a bad pedigree, and Director Douglas Aarniokoski ensures that visually things are interesting even if the story is somewhat thin – and strangely, gets thinner as events take their course. With a lessening of the sex, we are bombarded with more CGI effects the limited budget cannot sustain. This is a shame – with a more physical manifestation of the finale, it would have been more successful. CGI, unless expertly (and expensively) handled, robs a scene of atmosphere and reduces it to cartoon theatrics, and that is what happens here unfortunately. As such, it lessens the otherwise successful interpretation of John Skipp’s original story.

This low budget zombie project makes a good stab at convincing us the world has become an apocalyptic wasteland ravaged by the living dead. The dialogue over-eggs the story being told, with every (otherwise impressive) twist and turn being spelled-out to us. The zombie make-up comprises of actors wearing masks. Gruesome and detailed, yes, but they are masks all the same.

Lieutenant Colonel Sawyer (Robert Tweten) equips himself with so much armour and weapons, he resembles a kind of Robocop prototype. His mission is to bury the ashes of his family, and he travels across cursed, barren land to do so. On the way, he meets with hard-of-hearing Stephany (Ire Levy), who is being stalked by both the living dead, and sex-starved males throughout.

They meet up with elderly Wilson (John J Welsh), and here, typical horror-character-stupidity comes into play, when Stephanie decides to continue her journey without them. Her deafness, as you may imagine, makes for a perilous situations as she changes her wardrobe for a short skirt, before she is rescued and brought back into the fold. Some things never change.

Director and co-writer Rene Perez does a good job with this. Visually, it is very good, with nice panoramic views of deserted streets and the like. He also provide the terrific score, as ‘the Darkest Machines’. Where things occasionally fall down is due to some very slow scenes, often dialogue-lead, which seriously drag things down (the potentially interesting explanation of events from the President, outstays its welcome). The pleasing action sequences are worth seeing, however, with the zombies exploding gobbets of green gunk, reminding us how putrefied they are throughout.

I wasn’t massively impressed with this. With a title like ‘Killer Nun’, it is no great surprise to find Anita Ekberg’s Sister Gertrude behaving in a continually unorthodox manner, indulging in brief sexual dalliances (with both genders), drug taking and being horrible to those in her care. Ekberg plays the deterioration well, and Paola Morra is also excellent as Sister Mathieu - but on the whole, this is a very dull affair.

Director and co-writer Giulio Berruti lets some sub-par visuals pass, with background characters glancing at the camera and occasional scenes that would have benefitted from another take. Only towards the end do events become disturbing, and effectively so. At last Gertrude’s hallucinogenic events are increasingly frenzied and you get the feeling the film is finally getting somewhere. Sadly though, this feeling doesn’t last long, although there is a good twist at the end.

I get the impression ‘Killer Nun’ is quite happy simply to feature controversial scenes of a Nun (or Nuns) behaving badly and doesn’t really seem interested in progressing any further than that.

After a prologue that is almost sunk by some uncertain acting, the film proper begins with Dinah (Elena Caruso) and Jake (Chris Conner) attempting to patch up their marriage by moving to Amish country. Inevitably, they bring with them their two young children. But worry not – no petulant brats here: Steven (Noah Headley) and Michaela (Accalia Quintana) are appealing, especially the little girl, whose genuine delight about the wide open spaces in their new home becomes something else entirely as the story moves on.

This low budget feature is, however, possibly too restrained in its imagery. Happy to be creepy rather than terrifying, that’s fair enough - Director Ivan Kraljevic at least resists the monotony of constant jump-scares few films feel they could do without.

What we have is an enjoyable slow-burner that dips more than one toe into the ‘folk horror’ category. The nature of the horror, together with the location and the family’s new neighbours provide a different spin on things. This, together with genuinely sympathetic characters, makes a superficially tame production worth seeing.

Married Ruth and Miguel separate after Ruth finds a new man, Paul, whom she flaunts in front of her soon-to-be ex with not a care in the world. Thus she embarks on her fling, with which Director José María Forqué is far more interested in than we are. The pairing is smugness personified, and gorgeous looking as they may be, Analía Gadé and Jean Sorel, don’t invest the characters with anything much more than self-satisfaction.

Although it is difficult to sympathise with Ruth even when mysterious ‘accidents’ start occurring, there’s no doubt that Paul is a first rate twit whom you wouldn’t wish on anyone. Yet, when they inevitably make-up once more and we are treated to more overlong, ‘tasteful’ scenes of lovemaking – mere sex is too commonplace for these two – we realise they are as bad as each other.

When Miguel (Tony Kendall) turns up once more, Paul’s reverie appears to become fractured and, although things never really take off, events become slightly more interesting. Are Miguel and Paul plotting to kill Ruth? She gets the distinct impression they are.

Putting to one side the saturation scenes of the pairing, and some very unconvincing day-for-night shots, this is a very good looking film, quite aside from the gleaming blandness of the leads. The locations and landscapes, not to mention the buildings and décor, are breath-taking. Aside from that, however, we’re left primarily with three smug twits (or five if you include the more peripheral Rossana Yanni’s Danielle and Roland, played by Mauricio Bonuglia).

There are some interesting twists toward the end, when the audience is continually wrong-footed, but this rewarding pay-off doesn’t quite justify the tediousness that fills much of the running time .

One of the many reasons I have been drawn to the giallo genre over the last few years is the attention paid to locations. Beautiful, jaw-dropping scenery occasionally succeeds in distracting the viewer from a meandering plot, or plot details that sometimes make little sense. I also love that these productions are very ‘of their time’. That is to say, at their peak in the early 70s, their style virtually defines the look and style of those years.

This is very much the case with ‘The Designated Victim’, which Shameless DVDs have brought us from the brink of the abyss of ‘lost films’. Carefully stitching the project back together, we should be grateful that this exists at all. It has the exotic looks of the early 70s ‘turned up to 11’. The Venice locations are incredible, draped in chilly mist, which greatly enhances the enigmatic presence of fey Count Matteo Tiepolo (Pierre Clémenti, dubbed by an actor who seems to be channelling Michael Gough), all long curls and flowing, eccentric clothes. His relationship with weary playboy Stefano Augenti (Tomas Milian, also featured in the following year’s ‘Don’t Torture a Duckling’; he also sings the end theme) more than verges on the homo-erotic and adds an extra element to the murderous deal they strike: they agree to kill each other’s relatives. The two men are featured on most of the publicity, rather than the image of a nubile young woman as in other films of this type.

The exquisite music of Luis Enriquez Bacalov greatly compliments this stylish thriller. Shameless really have done an exceptional job restoring director Maurizio Lucidi’s magnificent looking project. A reworking of Alfred Hitchcock’s ‘Strangers on a Train,’ this is certainly leisurely paced and could contain more in the way of suspense – and yet to me, it looks so good, and the relationship between the leads is so weird, anything else is secondary.

I quite enjoyed this rather heavy-handed giallo entry. The direction (courtesy of Enzo Milioni, who also wrote this) veers from beautifully capturing some incredible locations to ham-fistedly inserting close-ups clearly not taken from the scenes they then return to. The score, by Mimi Uva is a mixed bag too – some nice synthesiser sweeps and some less effective moments that occasionally end abruptly as we move to another scene.

In short, you could say ‘The Sister of Ursula’ doesn’t quite know what it wants to be. It is difficult to ignore the distractions of drug-addict Fillipo (Marc Porel, a drug user on both sides of the camera) and some hirsute sexploits, and concentrate on a meandering plot-line with too many characters.

Bad-tempered Ursula is played very well by Barbara Magnolfi. Magnolfi has expressed disappointment with the erotic nature of the finished film, believing it was to be more of a psychological drama. I can only agree really. Ursula’s sister is Dagmar (Stefania D'Amario), and the two siblings find plenty of reasons to squabble throughout.

And yet enjoy this I did, with reservations. It’s not in the top tier of giallo by any means, but the performances and especially the choice of locations are breath-taking. Equally, there is a certain dream-like atmosphere during many of the latter moments.

I applaud the sentiments behind this film, giving King Kong another stab at happiness after the gruelling drubbing he received at the end of 1979’s underrated Dino De Laurentiis produced remake of the 1933 original.

There’s a lot that’s good about this, but moments that are bad, too, which makes viewing it both frustrating and rewarding by turns. The idea that Kong survived is, of course, appealing, but seeing the serious masked faces of various medical people operating the cranes and assorted machinery necessary to bring him back to life is impossible to take seriously – but then, I’m not entirely sure we’re supposed to.

Lady Kong, a burgundy-furred secondary primate stumbled upon by hapless hero Hank (Brian Kerwin) not only saves Kong’s life, but steals his heart (in a manner of speaking), and their sometimes awkward, sometimes appealing courtship is mirrored by that of Hank and surgeon Amy Franklin (Linda Hamilton). There’s too much ape frivolity, but a whole load of human stupidity to balance it out. Apart from the heroes, most of the non-simians we meet are either knuckle-headed military, cigar-chewing morons or inbred hicks determined to humiliate the supposedly noble beast and his mate.

The effects are often ropey, looking back. And yet the expressions on the animated ape-masks are often subtle and very effective. Equally Peter Elliott and George Antoni, the two actors sweltering inside the costumes, move and twitch in a sufficiently ape-like manner. All music is swamped by overbearing 80’s strings courtesy of often heavy handed Joe Scott.

Does The King and his mate get a happy ending this time? Fifty/fifty, really and their eventual fate is nicely handled.

‘King Kong Lives’ died a death at the box office and was obliterated by negative reviews. Although it now has a kind of cult appeal, it is not quite the hidden gem people claim it to be. Neither is it as bad as opposing views would have us believe. It’s perfectly acceptable to enjoy this, and you’re even allowed to have a tear in your eye toward the end.

One of the many things I enjoy about the giallo genre is that whilst the structure is similar with each film, the overall style can be infused with various other flavours. Here, the horror/thriller style is given a kind of ‘Rosemary’s Baby’ treatment, with the incredible Edwige Fenech playing Jane, who appears to becoming immersed into the world of the occult (this is a far more successful melding of genres than ‘A Black Ribbon for Deborah’ two years later).

Traumatised by the loss of her unborn child, Jane begins seeing the image of an impossibly blue-eyed man. As time goes on, this figure tries to kill her, and desperately lonely with her husband away for his work, she befriends nearby mysterious and condescending Mary (Marina Malfatti), who promises that if Jane attends a Black Mass ceremony, all her problems will vanish. As solutions go, it was never going to work. The blue eyed figure, now wielding a knife, warns her not to renounce the group.

Looking fabulous, poor Jane is catapulted from one nightmare to another, with partner Richard (George Hilton) turning up to save her. However, could he become ensnared in the cult too? You would hope not. Incidentally, in a sadly brief role as Jane’s sister Barbara is Nieves Navarro (here billed as Susan Scott), a million miles away from the carefree characters she played in ‘Death Walks… ‘ giallos from the early 1970s.

Beautifully directed in an occasionally hallucinogenic fashion by Sergio Martino, and mesmerizingly scored by Bruno Nicolai, ‘All the Colours of the Dark’ features a typically exciting climax. If you like giallo films, you’ll like this. If you’re uninitiated in the genre, I’d recommend it without question.

This is a fairly enjoyable film. However, it is very strangely paced.

A family move into a house in an idyllic, if isolated, location. Overbearing dad Bruce (Steve Jacques), fractious mum Jennifer (Cara O’Brien), gobby teenage daughter Kacie (Alana Chester - and boyfriend Mark (Tomas Decurgez)) and sensitive younger son Manny (David Mendoza). They film themselves during their first few days in their new home, and this ‘found footage’ is interspersed with interviews with friends and authority figures telling what is essentially the same story. The doom-laden tone of their discourse jars with the scenes of family squabbles and normality. Worse, this style of presentation goes on for far, far too long without incident.

There are murmurs and whispers about the neighbouring un-named Californian town having some kind of murderous mystery, but this is rarely expanded upon. What we do find out is that the entire family disappear overnight – we are told this fairly early on (in fact, news of their disappearance is the first thing we see, presented as anecdotal information on screen). Now all ‘The Purging Hour’ has to do is go through the motions of killing everyone and providing some kind of explanation.

To this end, the final fifteen minutes of the film’s 77 minute running-time is suddenly a mass of breaking-up images (‘this battery is dying,’ providing the reason for that), screams, a bit of blood and death. Sadly, no real explanation, motive or reason is given.

Open-ended films have to be handled carefully, or the lack of closure is frustrating. Here, it is doubly so as we have invested so much time watching the family go about their business of arguing, laughing, unpacking, eating etc, the lack of cohesion in the subsequent pay-off we have waited too long for is annoying. Even with these things in mind, I quite enjoyed ‘The Purging Hour’ – the acting is good throughout and writer/director Emmanuel Giorgio Sandoval’s style is confident, if uneven.

This is a low budget horror. It briefly features Doug Bradley as park owner Mr Hyde (Bradley worked for only one day on the film). ‘Fright Land’ is closing down, going bankrupt, and there is an eccentric plan to attract more customers.

There are some nice directorial moments here – the best being the dead body of a young blond girl tied to a functioning night-time merry-go-round. There’s a definite tension in the climactic scenes and a nicely ludicrous twist to make you groan.

I would never suggest you need to be familiar with the production background to appreciate any finished project, but there is no point criticising this for not have a multi-million dollar budget; it is what it is. Director/writer Cary Hill has financed this through the Kickstarter project, and results are occasionally dull, often interesting. Aside from the impressive Bradley, the cast turn in fair performances. My problem is, this tries to be a kind of horror film I have little enthusiasm for. A teen slasher flick often leads me to side with the villain – not so much the case here, although the characters do not always go out of their way to be likeable.

Pleasingly, there is no compunction to take things too seriously, and that is ‘Scream Park’s biggest asset. As the credits tell us, ‘No teens were harmed during the filming of this motion picture’.