Film Reviews by AER

Here is how I rank the current Saw films Top to bottom

Saw 1

Saw III

Saw X

Jigsaw (Saw VIII)

Saw IV

Saw II

Saw V

SawVI

Saw VII

Spiral (Saw IX)

This Flatliners remake/sequel was dead before it got made. The cast don't have a pulse, the script is rotting in the grave, and the pace is shambling. The original is very of it's time but it's still has lots of thrills and committed performances and lots of emotion. Sadly, this re-do is soulless, dead behind the eyes and pointless. How they made such a cool premise so boring is a mystery. Kiefer Sutherland (the nominal lead from the original) turns up as a different character, so perhaps this isn't a sequel. Sad to report that this was boring and suffers from a largely uncommitted cast who make their characters look like self-entitled idiots. They even muddle the afterlife / repentance aspect - it's pretty muddy and confused (and unscary). The SFX are unimaginative too - all glitches and slo-mo neon. This needed fresh ideas.

DOA 2 out of 10

Frantic begins with an intriguing mystery - while on holiday, a man's wife vanishes from their hotel? Where did she go? Did she run away? Was she kidnapped? Did she simply get lost in the city? Well, we've been here before (or is that since?) - while the film is watchable, as the riddle gets untangled, the story becomes less interesting and the plot more ridiculous. In the end, films like this ended up starring Liam Neeson. It's nice to see Paris in the 80s, and Grace Jones' music gets a lot of plays. Other than that, it stands up better than a lot of big 80s films, but what was probably once seen as sophisticated, doesn't dazzle anymore. There's a very nice scramble on rooftops which is memorable, and a decent score by Ennio Morricone too. MOR thrills and some good performances from all (in the 80s larger than life style).

High concept / low energy. Sadly, this great premise very loosely inspired by a real-life occurence, a bear takes cocaine and goes on a rampage killing all in its path, is wasted. It's a shame because it could have been lots of fun but it is let down by poor creature FX, unsure performances, and the decision to graft the mad bear on a series of uninspiring plot threads. It certainly has its moments but this is largely a curio that is a miss and not even a near miss. Shame as it had the potential to be the maddest film of 2023. Goodbye to Ray Liotta, in his last completed film role. I'd like to think he had lots of make up on because he looks severely ill in this.

Not enough bite. Disappointing.

This one exploits ill feelings toward the youth of time (2007-2008) trumpeted in some of more conservative and fear-mongering newspapers. A pretty couple go to a reservoir for some quality time and find themselves hounded by a bunch of chavs lead by Jack O'Connell. It taps into very real fears that speaking out can get you into situations where you are physcially out of your depth. Very quickly things violently escalate and events propel themselves towards a horrible open-ending. In an increasingly segregated right-wing UK this film pre-empted the siren call to stay in our lane, ot this is what will happen to you.

Nice early film for Kelly Reilly, Michael Fassbender, Jack O'Connell, and Thomas Turdgoose.

How can a film that tries to up the ante on Jaws fail to be at all thrilling? I don't know, but Shark Night did everything wrong. Bad SFX (that were 3D in cinemas), terrible characterisation, unconvincing kill scenes, and ridiculous baddies. I've seen some of the cast in other films (sometimes good films) but David R Ellis of Snakes on a Plane and Final Diestination (sequels) fame doesn't deliver on one single promise. This is dead in the water. More sharks less horror. How did that happen? Joshua Leonard from the Blair Witch Project has a supporting role and he's terrible (is it his fault?) - Blair Witch should have kept him under wraps.

Toothless.

The only good thing about Screamers 2 is the creature FX. The only person capable of acting in this film shows up for under 10 minutes at the ending (Lance Henriksen - Falling, Aliens, Dead Man). Everything else just serves to make the so-so original (starring Peter Weller) feel like a masterpiece. Stealing from films such as Aliens, and Starship Troopers this has no ideas of its own. All interest has been cribbed from the first film, and the twists are well-telegraphed. It's badly acted, poorly plotted and populated by characters who make verrrrry stupid and erratic decisions. Why Lance Henriksen signed on to appear in this bog-blocker is anyone's guess (even his lines are dyslexic) - 'If he killed himself, it wasn't suicide...' huh? I doubt anyone will ever read this review, because there are about 4 people on earth that know this film exists (even the cast don't know it exists) - so I leave this review as a lone probe into internet space hoping someone picks up my signal... It reads - 'don't watch this!' It's all second hand parts.

1 out of 10 - rusty

So many friends have asked me over the years 'have you seen Hot Rod? It's soooo hilarious!' My friends are sometimes right, sometimes they are wrong. They were kinda right this time, it was hilarious but for other people. It had it's moments but mostly I wasn't moved. I did like the co-c-c-cool beans and some of the more surreal aspects of it though, like the kickboxing sandwiches.

To OTT for me, like torrtally dood. Funky Fresh.

This full-length version Thanksgiving based on Eli Roth's fake trailer made for Grindhouse (2007) isn't as inventive as the trailer made out, or half as gross-out as the 'original'. Grafted to a standard revenge template, this features teens vs a masked murderer who in the run up to Thanksgiving has a axe to bury in people's heads. The killer is very easy to pin in this whodunnit and it runs it's rails very close to the style and tone of the Scream films. It's very watchable but offers nothing new, where in fact it could've been more creative based on what the fake trailer (and it's own trailer) promised us. Where was Michael Biehn from the fake trailer! Wish he'd have been in it. Instead we got Patrick Bateman this time around.

Thanksfornothing.... :)

By far, Saw 7 - The Final Chapter is the worst of the sequels. It's only a bit better than SPIRAL (Chris Rock's fan-made spin-off). It ends up chasing its tail creating polt holes galore in its wake. What promised to sew up the original run of films forever just left us with more impossible questions to answer. The return of key played Dr Gordon (Cary Elwes) is a waste of time and doesn't add any intrigue and there's no reason for Hoffman's endless psychotic bloodbath. Vol.7 killed the franchise of with bad acting, no new ideas and a thin plot. Jigsaw was better (purer) and Saw X was something of a return to form after the low points of 5, 6, and 7 (maybe 8) and SPIRAL....

Saw bore

Sadly, I'm going to follow the crowd and agree by saying a potentially great idea is squandered by a (usually) talented cast. Watching the one-at-a-time line delivery of the actors (at times) was excruciating. It was a film of unfunny monologues and lame twists. It was like a fanmade LOCK STOCK and TWO SMOKING BARRELS - no flare, no verve, no feeling for quality or entertainment value. The standout was the stalwart Tim McInnerny, but even he was wasted. I stuck it through to the ending but I regret it.

Lousy.

This was a very solid movie bolstered by great acting and an interesting story. Unconvincing plot turns marred the narrative: a black cop turns a blind eye and lets them escape at one point, they run out of petrol twice - 1st time a ride shows up right away on a lonely road, 2nd time, they come across a filling station at the exact right moment, - other tiny contrivances scupper what could have been more interesting if the random nature of life had led the way. Can't fault the acting and it was watchable, raising awareness of how different the USA and the UK are in some respects but all too similar in others.

A poignant tale of a woman who longs to see a mulberry tree that stood on her family's plot of land. It is the only living thing in her family that stood against the expulsion of her family and so many others from their homes in Palestine when the Balfour Declaration came into effect. Since childhood Fadia has lived in a permanent refugee camp over the border in Lebanon, just 15 minutes from her old village but she is unable to cross the border. It's a sad tale, one full of wistfulness and hope. Fadia makes friends with a British documentary filmmaker who sets off in search of her tree with very little concrete fact to go on.

There is also an interesting parallel story of birdwatchers and wild migratory birds who have no need for borders.

Interesting, heavy emotions, and worth a look to see a very human story to focus on as Israel and Palestine are at war in 2023.

This Guy Ritchie film is needlessly complicated. The framing of a simple revenge tale isn't the only thing that scuppers this potentially interesting Jason Statham starrer; what also ruined it is a poor script, flat characters and a miscast Statham. Nothing convinced me and everything felt laboured. The action sequences were slick but you had to wait 90 minutes for anything thrilling to happen. None of the cast seemed comfortable with a ropey script, I pitied Josh Hartnett who is just terrible in this. Eddie Marsan and Andy Garcia both struggle with weird accents too. So there's not much to say except the makers decided to build a maze in the middle of a very common or garden plot. Needed a better script and better performances (actors) for this to have worked. Even Den of Thieves and Ambulance were way better than this. PS: Wrath of Man was robbed of a cinema release in the UK because of the Covid epidemic...

This came out during Nicolas Cage's wilderness years that began with Bangkok Dangerous and ended around the time Jiu Jitsu came out. A few blips aside like JOE and BAD LIEUTENANT 2, NC's films were largely toilet duck. This stands head and shoulders above many of NC's films including the recent Renfield and The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent, and I'm sad I ignored it all these years thinking it was wack (like Sorcerer's Apprentice or Willy's Wonderland). This psychedelic revenge flick is aces - high is style and contains great performances. An interesting cast including Linus Roache (son of Ken Barlow from Corrie) and Andrea Riseborough. I loved the cameo from Bill Duke (PREDATOR) too! Inspired, f***** horrible, and brings something original to a well-worn plot model. A bit slow paced for action / horror fiends perhaps but I wasn't at all troubled by that.

8 out of 10 - Horrrrrrrible.