Rent Something in the Water (2024)

Deeply Derivative, Predictable, Silly Girly Sharky Brit-French CoProduction - watch THE REEF instead - Something in the Water review by PV

OK first thing to say is 90% sharks have GONE from the world's oceans in the last 30 years thanks to the disgusting shark fin demand from China and the Far East - shameful. These status symbols used for soup BUT just cartilage so taste of NOTHING - they are boiled in chicken broth. So barbaric and this vile Chinese habit is making sharks extinct! And the rest - elephants, tigers, pangolin, lions, the lot. SO I am with the sharks always.

Second, this is a move made to pander to the #MeToo movement clearly - the whole thing is almost man-free. THIS I think is the reason it was made in these wokeworld diversity tickbox days. No doubt all involved believe they are stunning and brave, esp with the LGB theme. Ironic it's the silly young women's fault they end up in the drink...

Sadly, the film itself is utter drivel though it starts well, in London... Clearly made on the cheap as we hardly see a shark and a small cast with a group of girls bobbing the the sea nattering and gossiping is most of the movie.

THE REEF is a way better film this borrows from - but that is intelligent, scary, tense and based on a true story, Watch that.

Or the best shark movies, the master - JAWS (1975) of course, but recent female-cast film The Shallows is watchable as is Open Water.

Less good are 47 Metres Down, a modern #MeToo movie too, and CGI-fests like Deep Blue Sea.

And then we scrape the bottom of the chum barrel with The Meg and the absurd Meg 2, the so-bad-it-sells franchise Sharknado, and the 2 or 3 or 5 headed Shark Attack, Ghost Shark, Sand Sharks, SO much shoddy shark nonsense.

1.5 stars rounded up