It's a cruel, violent, hedonistic world.... heat, sweat and knives - sex, drugs and aspirin. Welcome to Kitchen.... Young Danny Swift escapes a custodial sentence by taking a job as a commis-chef in the kitchen of Glasgow's most celebrated restaurant. The place is furious and language foul - Nick (Eddie Izzard), the brilliant but fading chef, pushing his team to the limit. But amongst the chaos, criminality and drug taking, Danny finds friendship - he and his fellow comrades are a band of cutthroats slaving on the private ship. Into this mixing bowl are placed a variety of colourful yet shady characters; there's Danny's Probation Officer exorting all kinds of favours, the sadistic sous-chef McQuilip, who either hates or fancies Danny, and the new arrival in the kitchen, Kirsty, who increases the temperature of all the assembled males. Increasingly desperate for his job, Danny takes a bet with the flash barman to have sex with a customer before his shift is over - the customer turns out to be his Probation Officer's wife, who neatly turns their encounter into a blackmail and murder opportunity... That's when Nick has a near fatal heart attack whilst the restaurant critics are in attendance....and the fun really begins...
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