Rent Murder on the Orient Express (2017)

Atrocious - Murder on the Orient Express review by AB

A Complete travesty of Agatha Christie, and vey sloppily executed in parts. Plus as usual the ugly spectre of cultural Marxism rears it's head, not like Hollywood is pushing an agenda or anything (yawn). Do yourself a favour and watch the 1974 version instead - it makes this looks like the utter trash it really is.

Should have been a lot better! - Murder on the Orient Express review by CS

I’ve read some very negative reviews of this film, but being a fan of Poirot and Agatha Christie, thought I’d give it a go! There have been some very hammy and poorly produced versions of this classic made in the past, as there have been with the other classic ‘Murder on the Nile’. But it’s very difficult to top the genius of David Suchet and what he brought to the role in the TV series, a standard so high, that to date all others have failed to follow! I often feel that you can judge the quality of a film and where it’s going to lead, from the first ten minutes and in this film the beginning starts in Jerusalem introducing us to a very rude, pompous, arrogant and conceited version of Poirot, played by Kenneth Branagh, who has also Produced and Directed the film. The opening scene with Jews, Muslims and Christians all standing by the Wailing Wall is fantastical in the least, given the notorious dissection of the city into different cultural and religious parts, with each section jealously guarded by those individual groups. This therefore comes across as perhaps a harping back to a more inclusive and tolerant past!

Then all aboard the Orient Express, where for the next half an hour we are rushed through being introduced to each of the main characters, played by an impressive ensemble of quality actors, each of whom have carved out their own legendary niches in the industry. However as each character is introduced, their personas are all again conceited, arrogant and self absorbed, perhaps intentionally so, but to the point where once again, the acting comes across as over the top and excessively hammy!

The films goes through the motions and runs along at quite a nice pace, as events unfold on board the train, in classic style. Branagh does bring a new twist at the end to this traditional classic whodunit, but the twist for me comes across as justifying revenge and saying it’s ok to murder someone in these circumstances. I couldn’t help feel a subtle parallel towards the Jews and felt there was perhaps a hidden agenda or message here, which again perhaps is why the beginning is set in Jerusalem!

Apart from the first half an hour, the rest of the film looks and feels like a Play that was filmed either on board an actual train in the studio, or completely in the studio in front of a blue screen, with scenery and effects superimposed. The scenery through the windows looked more like CGI than real scenery and when they stepped out of the train it looked like they weren’t actually walking on the ground as much as floating on it, like in the old movies when they filmed actors standing in front of a screen in the studio!

There was far too much use of CGI to the point that many of the external shots of the train looked almost cartoon like, in fact the train reminded me of the cartoon ‘Polar Express’, too much CGI applied giving an unrealistic animated feel, to what really should have been live action shots. Because of this, much of the photography and editing appeared a bit sloppy and rushed, poor quality, simply because of the excessive use of CGI, like watching Agatha Christie meets G.I.Joe !

For some vey peculiar reason they also suggest a heterosexual relationship or lost love for Poirot, something which is never mentioned in the TV Series or Books, almost as though due to past speculation, they felt the need to make this clear in order to appeal to certain territories or audiences.

One of the worst Christie films ever! - Murder on the Orient Express review by JB

The main question is, 'Is this so bad that it's worth watching just for a laugh?' - but it's not really that funny seeing a cast of such excellent talent mired in a dismal exploit like this.

Others have commented on the unecessary and gratuitous updatings, the 'spelling-it-all-out for a assumed audience of ignoramuses', the liberal posturing and so on. It was dispiriting to see one fine actor after another reduced to small and dismal walk-on roles while an absurdly hirsure Branagh plods through the mire towards enlightenment. The main excitement lay in the brief snatches of CGI imagery.

Don't bother.

Surprisingly Average - Murder on the Orient Express review by CP Customer

This film was amazingly poor considering the quality of acting talent employed.

Poor script and average plotting. Just about passed an evening with it but it wasn't entertaining.

Waste of time - Murder on the Orient Express review by PC

Truly terrible. A handful of decent actors given an appalling script. Just watch the excellent 1974 version instead. It was genuinely chilling and engaging, unlike this tosh

Whodunit? - Murder on the Orient Express review by Nick

Would have been more enjoyable if I did not know the ending, but having seen the superior 1974 version, the viewing was inevitably disappointing. If you are one of the few people that has not seen the earlier version or read the book you may enjoy it. Strangely, the star studded cast are wasted with very short parts as Richard Brannagh hogs the film.

There's only one word required to describe this film - Murder on the Orient Express review by CP Customer

BORING.

I can't review without writing 100 characters so let's go with dull, tedious, sleep inducing drivel.