I seem to have watched quite a few Australian films recently – and here's another, this time a teen / romance / horror film. What? You've seen many similar US-made films in the same vein? Think again – this one is as black as they come. Jilted wannabe prom queen gets daddy to kidnap the boy she fancies, tortures him, and adds him to the many others in the cellar. Err – that's it. There is gore but the film is not particularly scary, and although the torture scenes are nasty enough it's mostly off-screen or in your imagination. The film is laced with the blackest of black humour and this makes it watchable enough – although my favourite gorefest from down under is still Peter Jackson's 'Braindead' which is laugh-out-loud funny, if you like that kind of thing (yes, I know it's from New Zealand...). 'The Loved Ones' is OK, but it really needed to make me jump a lot more to get above 3/5 stars.