Stray sheep, diabetic socks, prostitutes with amazing foot dexterity and conjugals in the disabled... Welcome to the visiting room of HMP Radford Hill... Under the contemptuous gaze of megalomaniac Prison Officer Mark Bamford, visiting time gives inmates of this category C prison a brief respite from being banged up three-to-a cell - with only two Playstation controllers. Among the prisoners are Michael, driven to distraction by his speed-bump obsessed Dad, stupefied brother Stevie and his Nana's gifts of crucifixes and tinned fruit; "hardman" Clint, whose wife catalogues his young son's interest in dolls, cartwheels and stage musicals; Splodge Costello, whose campaign for the right to extra toilet roll takes pebble dashing to a whole new level, and Blind Pete, who may or may not actually be blind. Will Michael's appeal be successful? Will Clint find inner peace before he really twats someone? Will Blind Pete's visitor realise he is staring at her cleavage? To find out, just step carefully past the sniffer dogs and take your place in the visiting room...
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