Rent The Brand New Testament (2015)

Quirky but tedious - The Brand New Testament review by Alphaville

Nice idea soon runs out of steam. God is a cantankerous old man living in Brussels who hates mankind so much that he makes the toast fall jam side down. His 10yo daughter rebels and texts everyone to tell them the date they when they will die. There are some humorous moments here, but there are still 1½hrs to fill. So the daughter collects six disciples and each relates his/her boring ‘gospel’ with much use of voice-over and stagey talking to camera. Some reviewers seem to find this hilarious, but for most viewers patience will be in short supply.

Committed theists may find material here to titillate or offend them but it’s a pretty bland satire boringly filmed. Worst of all is the awful Benoit Poelvoorde, a Carry On character who shouts his way through the film as God searching for his daughter. And the Carry On score doesn’t help. Deicide was never more justified. A film for those who think that quirkiness compensates for depth of character, sustained

narrative or imaginative imagery.

Quirky, like Amelie on steriods - The Brand New Testament review by RW

Totally bonkers film that tells of God's daughter wanting to annoy her dad, to escape from her home and come to earth.

Didn't go where I expected it at all and was full of wonderfully quirky characters and a crazy plot. Some good laugh out loud moments, some emotional moments and something that made me smile almost all the way through.

Loved it and will definitely buy it.

We Are Made in God's Image - Makes Sense Now... - The Brand New Testament review by Strovey

Is The Brand New Testament offensive Christian bashing? I suspect it depends on your sensibilities on how you see this. I am not religious and can only see the hypocrisy and inconsistencies whenever Christianity or indeed any other religion is brought to bear on almost any topic. Nevertheless, you would like to think the almighty god, all-seeing, all-knowing, all-powerful, would have a fine sense of humour and fun. If my god exists he or indeed as The Brand New Testament posits, she, will have a great deal of enjoyment and fun from this film.

Even the most dunderheaded non-religious person can see the huge allegory at the story's heart. Our God here is chauvinistic, mean-spirited and spiteful – so Old Testament really, and his much nicer, loving daughter, who can hear the music that plays inside all of us, is the more palatable and preferable New Testament.

Benoit Poelvoorde easily plays the most uncharitable and unpleasant version of God put on the screen. God in many stories and tales punishes us humans for indiscretions and wrong-doing but here he punishes everyone arbitrarily, creates rules that spoil our lives, causes death and mayhem for no reason other than getting joy out of our suffering. Nothing else. I suspected as much. Poelvoode has great fun in this role, stomping about in a dressing gown, slobby and belligerent he gets to lose his temper in great cinematic style, be unforgivable cruel and get the tar beaten out of him. I mean what self-respecting actor would not want to do that?

The concept of everyone knowing their ‘end date’ is played out superbly in small vignettes, I mean what would you do? Director Van Dormael cameos as a 54-second man with inevitable consequences. Here as joint writer and director, he does not overplay this idea but instead gives us a glimpse of the world into which the news has been released. I love the idea of wars stopping, there being no point for the armies, but cleverly he does not overplay it and instead introduces our ‘apostles’ with it as we see how their revealed end-date changes them. Self-discovery and realisation being the initial introduction that is built on as the story progresses.

Van Dormael clearly plays with the concept of temptation and the path it can lead us down, whether morality is a religious concept or humans are by their nature caring and moral. None of this is truly answered and it is left to us the viewer to come to our own conclusion. After all, if we are made in God’s image then he would be vindictive and cruel, take ‘him’ away and does it take that away?

The Brand New Testament is funny and quirky in an ‘Amelie’ style and asks what is, without doubt, some deeply religious and fundament questions about the nature of humanity without ever really being a deep or meaningful film. It scrapes the surface so that those that watch it can delve in further or just pass it by.

Certainly this film is one of those strange European films that you probably have to seek out that is worth that search, different, fun, some superb child-acting by Pili Groyne, with the story not saccharine yet not unnecessarily mean-spirited and despite the, perhaps ‘heavy’ theme, at its heart just trying to be fun entertainment.

If you are not sure about this film – give it a go, what have you got to lose?